Father's Day Weekend (along with MANY hyperlinks)

We had a great Father's Day weekend, complete with Gigi, Doc, and Gramps!  Everyone got to see the new house, and Thomas got in some great playtime with the grandparents, which is always one of his favorite things to do.

In fact, on Friday morning, I went into his room to get him up, and said, "Thomas, Gigi and Doc are coming today after school!" 

That kid hopped up like his butt was on fire.  He was so pumped.  Immediately, he said, "I'm gonna show Gigi/Doc my new room!"  (side note---I simply LOVE how Thomas refers to them as one entity.  It's never Gigi AND Doc--always GigiDoc. :)

So you can imagine how thrilled he was when Gigi/Doc came with me to pick him up from school Friday afternoon.  This was, of course, after I had a little alone time with my mommy and daddy, outside of them having to be Gigi/Doc.  We went ot lunch at Olexa's, complete with warm vanilla wedding cake topped with chocolate ganache...oh my. 

Then after lunch, I took them to check out the house, and then they made my day by saying our housewarming present was ...  WAIT FOR IT: a trip to Target.

Best. Ever.

So while dad found a comfy recliner in the Target furniture section to relax in, mom and I picked out some great little treats for the house.   A fun new rug for T's room, and a new rug for the playroom, and on top of that curtains and a rod for the playroom to cover up what we're using as our makeshift attic space.  And I just think it looks fantastic.

So thanks mom & dad.  Quite the little treat.

After we picked up T, we went and met BT for dinner after he got off work at Village Tavern.  Another great spot, great service, and you would have thought the four adults were on a standard cruise ship meal plan, as all our plates looked the same: steak and mashed taters.  Maybe we should all check our iron levels soon....

Saturday started off with breakfast at Homewood Diner.  Have you guys been here yet?  I have to tell you, because it would really be a disservice not to tell you: they have the BEST cinammon rolls I have EVER put in my mouth.  For serious.  In every way.  This is sort of becoming our new favorite go-to little hometown place.  We are loving it.  Great food for great prices in a great little atmosphere. 

Can you sense a theme so far? 

Father's Day Weekend theme was apparently EATING.

After breakfast, we went over to Railroad Park for a little bit before we hit up the new Dora & Diego exhibit at McWane Center.  OH MY GOODNESS.  I didn't think we were going to be able to get Thomas out of there.  It was like watching a crack addict who hadn't been with the good stuff in a long time.  The kid went nuts.  In fact, after we finally pulled him off the Dora and Diego floor, we had to go back up there one more time before we left. 

T @ the Diego/Dora Exhibit

So my parents headed back home after McWane, and after nap, we hit the Freshworks festival up for a little bit.  That's where T discovered his (and mine too) love for the newest craze: Steel City Pops.   Oh my.  In case you were wondering, they really are as good as they say.  I recommend the strawberry. 

After that is when the shopping and prepping began.  I sent BT to the grocery store to get the food while I took T to get BT's father's day stuff. 

I have to admit.  I did a little Pinterest thing.  I can't believe I have caved to Pinterest.  But I did.  So oh well.  I have to acknowlege it, and just move on .  There.  It's out. 

How cute did THIS turn out?!

I'll leave it up to your imagination what label is behind the homemade sticker :-)

So to say I was ready to fall asleep on my face about 7pm Saturday night is an understatement.  Of course, I couldn't, because I had to make the dough for the pie crust.  But more on that in a second.

Sunday morning, my alarm went off at 5:45, and the Father's Day Feast prep began.  I got inspired this year by none other than the Pioneer Woman herself.  In fact, I picked the recipes I used of hers after I watched her food network show. 

And I need to tell you to do something: GO MAKE THESE RIGHT AWAY.

Father's Day Feast included her Spicy Pop Pulled Pork, sauteed green beans, tasty rolls, baked potatoes, and for desert, her Flat Apple Pies with perfect pie crust (and the pie crust really was perfect, and EASY AS PIE, pun intended). 

In fact, both recipes of hers were SO easy, that I'm sort of embarrased to say that's what they were.  But I guess it works in my favor, and it'll work in yours too.  Because both taste like you slaved in the kitchen for hours.  In fact, aside from the little bit of prep time involved (I made the dough the night before and stored it in ziploc bags, then rolled it out the next day), the food essentially cooks itself.  Especially the pork.

Now remember this if you make the pork (which  you should): it does have a bit of a kick to it.  I mean, it marinates for six hours in chipotle peppers.  But from someone who likes spicy, but not too spicy,  I can tell you it's actually the perfect combo of sweet and spicy, thanks to the brown sugar.  Just make sure you remove the chipotles before serving. 

I never took a picture of the pork.  But I can tell you it went really fast. 

But this is how my pies turned out. 
I can tell you they were good because BT ate off it for the two days following that!

So Gramps and BT had quite the feast that day.  Thomas preferred the pie over the rest.  Of course, who doesn't?

On another note, I've ordered my (very) early Christmas present.  A new camera, which I'm super excited about.  I wanted to go ahead and get it for our trips this summer.  Beach & Disney are both coming up very soon.   Can I just say: I am SO excited to spend an entire week at the beach.  It'll be me, BT, Thomas, my parents, and my brother. 

And even better: fireworks at the beach for the Fourth. 

It's been a long time since I've gotten to see those fireworks in the sky over the water....

Just somethin' about it.

Yes, y'all, it's a very GOOD year. 

Home

After closing on our house, and living like gypsies, we are finally moved in. 

It feels good.

Now we're getting used to life in a little cottage. 

It's not particularly smaller than our last house, but we have lost an attic and a garage basement, which means we've lost a good bit of storage space. 

So we're learning to minimalize, and to actually only save what we find actually memorable, not junk.

Even though, that still equates to about ten tubs' worth of stuff all piled into a giant closet in the sunroom.

It's not perfect yet, but it's getting there. 

I'm really loving it so far. 

I'm loving my five minute commute to work even more. 

Our neighbors are great, the neighborhood is better, and we're digging how close we are to the park, to the church we've been visiting, to shops and restaurants, and to everything.  It really is quite livable. 

We dig it.

Can't say with certainty how long we'll be able to stay here before running out of room, but that's okay, and for now, well, we can just make do. 

It's all about simplifying, right?
About not sweatin' the small stuff, literally.

My favorite part about the new house: the gas stove. 
Hands down.
Best ever.
I'm so glad I can finally cook with some gas.

My least favorite: the high efficiency front loading washer and dryer.
Who invented these things?
They trap moisture like a champ, and it's absolute hell on your back getting clothes out of that washer and moving it to the dryer.

Maybe I'm stuck in my ways, but I just like the good, old school, top loading W&D. 
Oh well, that I can get over. 
First world problem, for sure.

Outside

He picked out his new room by strategically bringing his crayons and play-doh box in there.

Pre-Furniture

Guess who this bathroom belongs to?

This kid LOVES his new room

Unpacking stage

At "the new park"

Lovin' me some built in bookshelves

First meal, cookin' with gas

So we are settled in. 
Since we're renting, who knows if we'll be here for a year, or for longer.
That's yet to be determined, and we're in no huge rush. 

For now, we're home.

The Gypsy Life

"When you look into my eyes, and you see the crazy gypsy in my soul,

it always comes as a suprise when I feel my withered roots begin to grow.

Well I never had a place that I could call my very own,

that's all right, my love, cause you're my home."
~Billy Joel

Since I last wrote, we packed up our house, closed, and moved out.  Specifically, we closed last Tuesday the 22nd and moved out at exactly 4:30pm May 23rd.  That's when BT and I pulled out of the driveway. 

It was bittersweet.  I can't quite begin to put into words all that's happened in that house. 

Our first house.

We danced
We laughed
We cried.
We mourned.
We wept
We smiled
We hugged.
We kissed boo boos
We were lazy
We were stressed
We were silly.
We grew up.
And we got up each and every morning, and did it over and over again.

So I try to remind myself that while we may have left our house, we took our HOME with us.  Those two boys.  That dog.  That's my home.  Nothing else.  So we live the gypsy life for a while.  That's just okay. 

So we have been experiencing this gypsy life in a whole new way.  Right now, we're lucky to have my aunt and uncle in town who are gracious enough to take us in for a bit.  So it's really not been bad.  I'm just really tired of living out of a suitcase and my car.

Thomas is handling it all like a champ.  He thinks this is like a little adventure, and I think he likes it. 

This weekend, we took advantage of being homeless by getting out of town.  We spent a day and night in Montgomery with Gramps, then on Sunday, we headed north to Chattanooga to meet some friends of ours on a last minute getaway.  When we got there Sunday, we did the Incline Railway.  No one really prepared me for how insane that was going to be, both with the ridiculous lines, and for this girl who is afraid of heights, to do THIS.  So it's pretty safe to say that this girl won't be doing that again.

Ice Cream Waiting on the Incline

Going UP

He Loved It!

After the Incline, we ate dinner out, and then hit the hay (or for Thomas, also known as 'lay all over mommy in the hotel bed all night').

We hit up the Creative Discovery Museum Monday morning and Thomas LOVED it.  It's actually a lot like McWane, but smaller, and I thought it had a lot more stuff for the younger kids to do.

At the Water Table

Boats & Pulleys

In the Kitchen

Working as a Beekeeper in the Beehive

Tinkertoy Puzzles

More Puzzles: In Heaven with all the Puzzles

After the museum, we ate some lunch at Mellow Mushroom, then headed back home to our last week of the Gypsy Life. 

We're moving into the house on Saturday.  I think it's safe to say we're all READY to get settled in again to our own little lives.  I'm ready to get the house put back together, and Thomas is ready to pick out his room. 

So you may not hear much from us for a little bit.  It's very busy, and super fun.

I had a few friends/family call or email or text on the 25th, the day Kathryn died.  My BFF called me the day before, and said, "If I don't call you in the morning, I will call you, and I'll be thinking about you."  It took me a second, because in my head I had totally forgotten for a second and I thought, "why?"

I think that's a good sign, not that I had forgotten, but that life was just too good otherwise to focus on the sadness....

ONE

Dear Kathryn,

This birthday letter is late to you.  But in my defense, your brother's 2nd birthday letter was late too, so I'm just trying to keep things even between you two. 

Sunday, May 13th, was your birthday.  What would have been your first birthday. 

ONE. 

I can't quite explain to you what it's like commemorating a day that changed our lives without the ONE that changed it. 

Sunday morning, I woke up, at my parents' house, and sleeping in the same room as your brother.  I woke up early, and aside from Thomas' snores, alone.  You see, your daddy  had to stay at home last weekend to help us pack up since we're moving to a new house very soon.  We've had that house on the market since before you were born, and actually, since before we ever knew you were sick.  We wanted more space, knew we needed more space, and really wanted to get to a 'forever' spot. 

Then you got sick, and then you died..  But we kept the house on the market because now, we had a new reason to sell it.  We knew it would take a while, and we knew that ultimately, we could really use a fresh start.

So that being said, we're finally under contract.  We close a week from today.  You would really like our new little house.  We're renting for a bit, but this house is perfect for us.  It's got a great backyard for your brother and Beau, and hardwood floors, a fireplace, a cozy kitchen, and there's something about it that feels like it's exactly where we need to be right now.  I'm so grateful for that. 

So I woke up early Sunday morning, in a bed by myself, and while your brother slept in the pack n' play on the floor, I let the tears go.  I cried over not being able to come into your room on your birthday and celebrate ONE with you.  I cried over not being able to plan a party.  I cried over not being able to get you a ONE shirt just like your brother's. 

Tears over milestones missed.
Hugs missed.
First steps missed.
First tooth.
First smile.
First laugh.
First bath.

First.
ONE.

It got stolen from us, Kathryn. 

You would love your brother so much.  He is such a charmer.  He would take such good care of you. 

He keeps telling us over and over again that he wants a baby sister.  And every time he does, your daddy and I look at each other, in silence, and our hearts break over and over again.

He doesn't remember you. 
But then, sometimes he does something that makes me think he does. 
We talk about you, alot, and two year olds are a lot smarter than we give them credit for.  Every now and then, he mentions you.  So I know he knows, and I know he loves you, just like we do.

Life here goes on.  Your daddy and I are more in love than ever before. 
And we've found our laughter again. 
Our little family is doing okay, and we're all hanging in there.

I can't even begin to tell you, though, Kathryn, how much you are missed.  Your Gigi and Doc miss you, your Gramps misses you, everyone here misses you and thinks about you all the time.  It's like this little hole will be here forever. 

So on Sunday we celebrated your birthday and Mother's Day all wrapped in one.  And what comforted me most was knowing you're not alone up there.  I know your Grammie and your great-grandie and all our family from years past gave you the ONE celebration you deserved.  You are whole.  Happy.  Healthy.  Complete. 

Happy ONE, dear.

Love,
MOM

20 Days

I think this is a first for me. 

Twenty days without writing on here is some sort of record. 

That just goes to show you how crazy life has been around these parts. 

So I'll attempt a recap. 

This has been a really good month.

After I last wrote, BT and I went to the beach for four days to celebrate our 5th anniversary. It was fantastic, just what I needed. We did a lot of relaxing, a lot of reading, a lot of eating, a little playing, and really just enjoyed the quiet. We were quiet a lot that weekend. It was good. It was needed.

Our little condo



Sunset

 And while we relaxed, Thomas had a blast with Gigi, Doc, & Uncle Myles.  That kid sure does love his gigi/doc, but I'll be honest, he has a special place in his heart for Uncle Myles.  I think it's because they can really relate to each other's silliness.  Not sure what that says about my 25 year old brother, but it works for the two of them :)

Thomas Playing with Myles in the backyard

Thomas & his Doc

At the Mall

Sacked out from a great weekend!

When we got back from our trip, we basically did laundry, ran through another week of work, and repacked to head back out of town the following weekend.  We spent the weekend with our friends from college, some of my very best girls, and the ones that know me so very well.  We try to do this at least once a year, and have been very lucky that Kerry & Jeff have opened up their little haven outside of town for us to get together.  It's always so peaceful.  This year, it was a little chaotic though, with 7 kids under 6!  But we had such a wonderful time.  Good sleep, good food, good wine, good conversation, and for seven children that young, very few tears!

Thomas and Cassie May, watching TV on Saturday morning

Fishing

T's first time fishing.  He loved it!

Four of Seven in the hot tub: Thomas, Allan, Bennett, and Addie

Left to Right: Bennett, Celia, Thomas, Samuel, Cassie, Addie, & Allan



Last Day Picture with the Girls

 Saturday afternoon while we were there, Natalie, Taylor, and I were sitting out on the deck in the rocking chairs enjoying a rare moment of quiet while the boys had most of the older kids out and about.  Taylor asked me, in the way only she can, as she has such a way with words:

"How are you?  I mean, how is your HEART?" 

 No one has phrased it quite like that before. 

So I told them: it is what it is.  My heart feels pretty beat up.  But what else is there to do?  There's a peace in that.  So we talked for a bit about the peace that comes with knowing that something just is how it is, and being okay with it.  It's a challenge to come to that point.  For anything in life, whether it's a death, a loss of a dream, someone letting you down: it's the loss of control, and the acceptance of the fact that it just really sucks sometimes.  And they get that. 

That's why that weekend was so good.  Because they get it.

SO--fast forward to after that weekend.  We had two showings on our house that weekend, and found out Sunday night that one of them was very interested.  This is huge, as our house has now been on the market for a year. 

We originally put it on the market because we needed more space. 
Then, that reason temporarily went away.  But we kept it on anyway, knowing we wanted a fresh start, and wanted to move eventually, realizing it could take quite some time.

The offer came through on Tuesday. 
I'm not gonna lie: it was lower than we would have preferred. 
But that's about right in this market.  So after a few counter-offers, we both came to an amount that we were happy with. 

If all goes well with inspection, we are supposed to close THREE WEEKS from tomorrow. 
We have to clean out.
We have to pack.
We have to FIND A PLACE TO LIVE.

These are all big stressors.  But it'll work out.  Another lesson in patience and trust for me.

It's an exciting time for us. 

And it seemed appropriate that we capped off last week's excitement with March for Babies in memory of Kathryn on Saturday. 

BT & T at the walk

Baby Liam: Crawling for Kathryn

My favorite picture right now

Me & Mally

Heather, Amber, & Me

Saturday morning at the park

Amber & T

Holding on tight to his free Kmart bag

On the Walk

First Place :)

It was a beautiful day.  We had about 18 of our friends and family out there to celebrate and walk with us.  There were a few tears, a lot of laughs, many smiles, and I left feeling very full in my heart, deep down to my belly.  You know, just that DEEP feeling of satisfaction.  The one that pulls at your core.  That's what I felt on Saturday.  It was perfect, minus, how my aunt put it, the beautiful 11 month old girl that should have been there with us.

And now, tomorrow it is May. 

I'm trying to wrap my head around all that's going to go on for us in the next two weeks with looking for a place to live, packing, and also giving myself a little grieving room for what's coming up on May 13.  It really actually might serve as the perfect distraction for me.

I should be planning a 1st birthday party. 


But I'm not. 
And the year has given me time to accept it. 

It's hard to get too sad when there's just so much beauty all around. 

It's just really SO. BEAUTIFUL.



Mommy/Tommy Day, Easter, & Life All Around

Great weekend last weekend.

T's school was closed on Good Friday, and I was off work, so T & I had a great Mommy/Tommy Day.  We did it last year too, but last year's Easter weekend was a little different, if you remember from THIS POST.

So in true mommy/tommy fashion, we did it up RIGHT. 

Watchin' Cartoons While I Get Ready

Dunkin' Donuts for Breakfast: Thomas ate two donut holes and said "I'm full.  Let's go to the zoo!"



So off to the zoo we went: and had to wait fifteen minutes for it to open :)



Checking out the alligators

T's first ride on the zoo Train.  He was IN HEAVEN.

Snack Time

Riding the Carousel

Playing on the Playground

 After the zoo, we went to Chick Fil A for lunch and time on their playlot, then home for nap.  I think it's pretty obvious that he sacked out for naptime.

So when he woke up, and I asked him what he wanted to do, Library and Tot Lot were clearly on our agenda.  So off we went.

On the Tire Swing

Overall, we had a fantastic day.  I splurged on him a little on Friday, spoiled him a lot.  But all in a good way.  All in the way that sometimes, a kid just needs to be spoiled.  That time, especially as a working mom, it just doesn't come around that often, even with my schedule :-)

Easter weekend followed, and we had a great day together, just the three of us.  Church, brunch, nap, and time down at the creek.  For a kid that loves all those things, it just doesn't get much better than that. 

The Easter Bunny went a little nuts this year

BT & Thomas, at brunch

Growing Up

Shoveling Dirt in a Bucket by the Creek

Walkin' Back Home

It really was a pretty perfect weekend. 

You see, I've been making some choices lately. 
Choices I never thought I would make.  Choices that, I can't help but think have been on my mind since about HERE. 

Little things.  Not earth shattering things. 
But changes in the priorities. 
Changes in the process. 
Patience in the midst of the unknown.

So those changes, those subtle little changes: well, they made this weekend all the more sweeter.

Cryptic?

Maybe. 

But that's just really okay.